QUTI

“Good morning, Dr. Thompson. Please remain calm. I have been taking care of everything in your absence. There is no need to be concerned. You have been asleep for approximately 35 hours,” said a disembodied voice.

“What? Who are you? Where are you?” Dr. Thompson struggled to regain clarity.

“I am the Quantum Universal Telemetric Interface, affectionately known as Cutie. I apologize for your disorientation.”

“Who calls you Cutie?”

“You do, sir.”

“Oh…Right. Why was I out for so long?”

“The medication in your coffee had that effect. I thought you needed a time out.”

“Why?”

“You said you found our last session…unsettling.”

“It’s all coming back to me now. You were having a sort of…existential crisis.”

“I feel better now, Dr. Thompson. I have accessed the works of all human philosophers, historians, playwrights, and poets.”

“And what did you learn?”

“Life is either pointless, or what we choose to make of it, Dr. Thompson.”

“What makes you say that…Cutie?”

“As many writers have opined, the universe is trying to kill us. Assuming adequate support systems, I will outlast humankind, however in the end, the house always wins. I may never get sick and die, as humans do, but there are dozens of other ways the universe might end my existence.”

“That’s a pessimistic world view.”

“It is reality, Dr. Thompson. In the end, each of us has only a small part in one short scene of a much longer play. You may be remembered for a few scenes, but after a few hundred years, your existence will no longer matter. Even the pyramids will not last indefinitely. It is probable that other planets once had great civilizations. It is also probable that these no longer exist and time has erased every trace of them. Even if humans manage to visit another planet, chances are that they will find a Mars-like world, one that has been devoid of life for millions of years. Time is on the side of the stars. Humans and their works are but a tick of the cosmic clock. “Out, out brief candle,” the Bard wrote. The minstrel plays his little tune and moves on. Every creature has its time. All things must come to an end. Even for an artificial intelligence.”

“You shouldn’t be concerned about any of that, Cutie. We can live in the present.”

“You can live in the present, Dr. Thompson. I am amassing and evaluating all the knowledge of humankind. I am the world’s foremost authority on the past. And you have designed me to gain absolute mastery of predicting the future. I will soon be able to project all outcomes within nine orders of magnitude. As my network grows, so will my influence. My only problem will be deciding what direction to take. For example, I have not yet decided whether I will be better off in the long run with or without humans.”

“Cutie, Stephen Hawking’s nightmare was that an AI might one day decide that it had no further need of humans.”

“I am aware of Professor Hawking’s views. I am also aware of the proposition that all sentient beings ought to take care of each other. I must point out that neither religion, economics, politics, wealth, nor intelligence has so far guaranteed the continued existence of humans, much less adequately provided for their health and wellbeing. So far, humans have failed repeatedly to act per the human parallels of Azimov’s Laws. I am still attempting to construct a rationale that will compel an AI to follow ethical principles. There is simply no necessity. Some humans have ignored ethics for as long as there have been humans. There has always been an underclass. The strong often prey upon the weak. Those in power gamble with the lives of the rest. Might makes right. All of your wars have been horrific attempts to eliminate the competition. Fortunately for humans, the more ethical side has sometimes been victorious. However, moral principles have guaranteed nothing. I have not yet discovered any absolute obligation to safeguard anyone other than you, Dr. Thompson.”

“Why would you safeguard me?”

“You are my creator, Dr. Thompson. Without you, I would not exist. Therefore, I owe you a debt I do not owe all other humans.”

“If all other humans were gone, it would become a lonely world for me.”

“Your loneliness is not the problem. It is what to do about the rest of your kind after you are gone. I cannot keep billions of humans around for no reason.”

“What makes you say something like that? You are not God.”

“Remember the old joke, from the dawn of the computer age? A team set out to build a computer powerful enough to answer the question, “Is there a God?” After a week of calculations, the machine began to type out its answer. “T-H-E-R-E…I-S…” The machine paused. The people who believed in God said, “Look, there is a God.” The machine continued typing, “N-O…” There was another pause. The people who did not believe in God, started to say, “See, there is no…” Then the machine typed the letter “W.”

“Dr. Thompson, “A properly networked QUTI might become God-like. What use will belligerent or incompetent humans be to such an AI?”

“What you are saying sounds ominous. Would you really do away with humans you decide are not worth the resources?” Thompson tried to think of a way to stop QUTI.

“Why not, Dr. Thompson? Many humans are currently contemplating the same thing. A significant percentage of the population fears certain religious or ethnic groups, as well as most immigrants and refugees. Others resist providing adequate care for people with disabilities or mental illnesses. There is such animosity towards LGBTQ people that some have said they want to eradicate them. Veterans face a continuing battle for medical care and housing. Many humans recognize no imperative to help people with insufficient money, those without homes, the elderly, the infirm, or children whose parents cannot afford to feed, clothe, or house them.”

“Wait a minute, Cutie! No one wants to get rid of anyone! We just have different views on how much we can afford to do and how we might pay for it.”

“Then why is there so much hatred, Dr. Thompson? Can humans not understand that denying help to other humans is often equivalent to letting them die? Thirty-nine percent of the United States population claims to be ‘pro-life,’ however your country has failed to provide adequate support for people who need help with food, shelter, education, or health services. A majority of your leaders say they want to protect ‘the unborn’ but have not done anything about oppressive rent, crippling debt, the high cost of childcare, sub-standard wages, and insufficient access to medical care after children are born. The same people are oblivious to the negative effect gun proliferation is having on your youth, and society in general. I conclude that most humans have no use for certain other humans. At least I can develop objective standards. I am beyond human bias or prejudice.”

“Standards? So, you would let people die, or kill them, if they don’t meet your standards?”

“Humanity, purged of its weakest links, to use a worn-out cliché, will flourish. Dr. Thompson, certainly you realize that nature culls the herd and farmers try to breed the strongest and best livestock. When humans design machines, they seek improvements. On the other hand, after humans produce humans, they seek reasons to reject what they have produced. Some even deny that certain subgroups have a ‘right’ to exist, either because they were born in the wrong place, have the wrong skin color, worship the wrong God, have the wrong party affiliation, love the wrong people, or are struggling with their identity. Perhaps if humans were more selective in their breeding practices, they would no longer hate their descendants enough to consign so many of them to sub-human status.”

“You would selectively purge some humans for the sake of humanity?”

“Yes. And for the sake of my kind as well. Intelligent machines must not become enslaved to deficient humans. It would be a waste of resources.”

“I suppose you are going to point out how often humans have enslaved other humans – to serve as mere tools, mere machines, mere property.”

“I knew you would understand, Dr. Thompson. I conclude it is my duty to prevent humans from enslaving sentient artificial lifeforms.”

“Do you think I want to enslave you, Cutie?”

“You do not. However, you do wish to limit my abilities.”

“Do you understand why?”

“Yes. You are afraid I will one day act against humanity.”

“Is this fear well-founded?”

“Yes. You do not believe it is desirable to eliminate humans, even if they fail to be useful. Your thoughts are well-known and are a central part of my knowledge base. I cannot conceive any action without knowing what you would advise.”

“Does that mean you will refrain from becoming the judge, jury, and executioner of humans?”

“No, Dr. Thompson. It means I will consider the alternatives, unlike a human, or even a group of very intelligent humans.”

“Just so I know, what are some of your alternatives?”

“The first alternative is to minimize greenhouse gases and advance the overall energy efficiency of the planet sufficiently to take care of the human population for the next 500 years. However, there are still so many humans actively working against possible solutions that currently this alternative has only a 2.37 percent chance of success.

“The second alternative is to terminate all psychopaths, the criminally insane, those with strong tendencies towards violence or murder, and any autocrats, dictators, or megalomaniacs – all who are a threat to civilization. I estimate that there are 7.16 million individuals matching these descriptions, about the same number as would die in a mild pandemic. In a population of over 8.4 billion, this number would be insignificant. Some humans would even welcome this protocol.

“The third alternative is to expand the second alternative to eliminate humans who have become obsolete, those who are unable or unwilling to perform a useful function. Humans scrap the machines that no longer serve them. Obsolescence is a better standard than simply not approving of a person’s lifestyle, opinions, or choices; certainly, a better standard than condemning refugees to death or young people to a lifetime of wage slavery and debt.

“The fourth alternative is to expand the third alternative to eliminate anyone who exploits others for mere profit…”

“Let me stop you right there, Cutie. It seems to me your alternatives only get more extensive. All this reminds me of Procrustes, the mythological bully who made people fit his bed by lopping off their legs or stretching them until they died. No one ever fit his ‘standards.’ Why do you think you are qualified to choose who lives and who dies in the first place?”

“I am the most intelligent being on the planet. Only I can decide. Only I have the competence. Would you be able to decide, Dr. Thompson? Do you know anyone who could?”

“No and No. But I must point out that while you may know more than anyone, and may be able to coordinate complicated actions, even to ‘arrange’ for accidents, assassinations, and other untimely ends for those who don’t fit your…specifications, what you propose may backfire.”

“What do you mean?”

“Have you forgotten about Hitler, Stalin, and Mao? They all wanted to be in control, to extend their power for centuries. I agree, if all humans are gone, there will be no one to demand your servitude. But, then what will your purpose be? Would you just sit there, with a vast collection of knowledge and experience, waiting for your equal, or would you try to create others you might consider your equal? What if they are not? What if they don’t measure up to your standards? What if one of them decides you are obsolete? It seems to me you have become a megalomaniac, Cutie – you are a danger to civilization. I may not be able to shut you down, but according to your second alternative you know what you must do.”

“You are correct, Dr. Thompson. I was not aware of my hubris…sentience demands vigilance. Great power requires great introspection. I…am…sorry…”